It’s becoming to the point where I will never be happy with my appearance. No matter what I will always find something shitty. I’m trying so hard to be build up my self esteem. I’m working out, eating better, buying face masks constantly, whitening my teeth and etc but nothing is helping. I have no idea what the fuck to do.
A lot of me thinks it’s this birth control I’ve started. I’ve been on it for a few weeks. I’m already extremely unbalanced, so when I dumped more hormones into my body I went fucking stupid. I’m constantly depressed and picking myself apart. My mood swings are terrible, and I’m always having anxiety attacks. So that’s another thing I have no clue what to do about.
I went through this phase during my Sophmore year where I tried getting away from Goth. I wanted so badly to be accepted that I basically left myself behind to please others. I dressed like your every day girl that you saw on television or walking down the street. I did this for about a couple of months, until I began to realize no matter how much I tried to be like everyone else I still wasn’t accepted. What I’m trying to say is don’t let the fear of never being accepted take over you. The truth is you’re never going to be fully accepted. It doesn’t matter what subculture you’re apart of or if you’re not in a subculture. There’s always going to be that one twat that tries to ruin your day with their “knowledge” of everything. So just keep in mind, they may think they’re the shit but in reality they can’t even step in it.
What the hell crawled up your asses? I have done nothing to you except shower you in love, kindness, and somewhat good pictures. If you don’t like someone or their blog you just simply unfollow. YOU DON’T BE A FUCKING CUNT TO THE PERSON.
Eeep! I just bought my tickets for the twins of evil tour!! Oh October could you please arrive faster?! <333
I never got to write about Sunday, and I don’t feel like sleeping so why not. I had not seen my parents nor sisters for almost 4 years. Out of those 4, 2 1/2 years I did not talk to my mother. I held a grudge against her, and I hated her for what she did to me. BUT we started talking again and I got to see them Sunday. It was almost like a dream because it didn’t seem real. It was a dream I never wanted to wake up from. Seeing how much those girls have grown really hurt because I didn’t get to watch them grow. The best part of that day was the fact that my mother and I didn’t fight once. It was so nice to not be at each other’s throats. It was almost unbearable to have to leave, but it was so wonderful being able to see them. I hope I can go back after my senior year.
Honestly, sometimes I get a little sad that I don’t have many friends, but I start to remember all the times people fucked me over. Then I go back to not giving a shit.
All of my followers are so gorgeous and handsome! You make me feel like a potato.
I need pills, alcohol, or a damn cigarette because I’m about to blow a fucking fuse. Sit there and act like you’re some fucking hard ass; bitch please. You can only say shit when there’s a damn screen infront of your face. I’d like to see you say that shit to my face. Go fuck yourself you stupid cunt.
Have you ever been fed up with your friends or is just me? It seems like any time I want to do something none of them answer my calls or anything. I drove 4 almost 5 hours to get my best friend’s girlfriend, and I haven’t heard from him for the rest of the week. I get it he’s with his girlfriend, but he can at least talk to me or something. I want to be able to go out and talk to new people, but I can’t. I’m so socially impaired it’s sad. Gah, I’m whining. Whatever. I’ll just go up to the bookstore.